the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Randomize
