okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
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