I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
