Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
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