So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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