...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
i permit you to call me
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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