dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
