you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Randomize