She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize
