We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Randomize
