Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
