This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Randomize
