the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I think a kid would responsible me up
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Randomize
