NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
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