sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Randomize
