Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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