The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
why does every cop we meet know your name?
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
