no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
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