I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
