I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Randomize
