that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
i out mim tonsoeep
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize