I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Randomize
