Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
