He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
