We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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