Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
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