are you still at the devil's house?
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
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