So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Randomize
