omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Dude, I just masturbated with my cat sleeping on my boobs....
You have GOT to get this crazy cat lady thing under control. I'm finding you a man. And you'll take him, and thank me. After that text, you have no right to be picky.
Randomize
