somebody snuck up and got me drunk
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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