So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
you will always have a special place in my vag
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Randomize