There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
