I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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