Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize