Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
