yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
I'm always down for nudity.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
