She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
We're using joints as your birthday candles
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize