im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
