I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
