i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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