Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Randomize
