drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Randomize
