one two three fourrrrnication!
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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