dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
