i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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