just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Randomize
