This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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