The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
