You were right. It hurts to walk today.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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