I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Randomize
