I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
try to milk me bitch
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