He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
Randomize
